“Really?”I was broken. There was a hole inside me. But in that moment all the jagged bits inside stopped shifting around. I could suddenly breathe easier. Bethany wasn’t asking if she could really stay the night. She was asking if I was really able to call her Bee again.She had hurt me. There was a time I had thought her betrayal was the worst pain in the world, but I was wrong. I thought Mark picking Lydia over me was worse, and maybe it was, but losing Sam had shown me what real pain was. The kind that takes your breath away and never gives it all back. Calling her Bee again, forgiving her, let me snatch a breath back from old man death.“I think so, yeah.”She reached across the table to clutch my hand in both of hers. Her old smile returned slowly and I could feel my own lips pulling to answer. “Oh my God, I missed you so much. I was such an idiot. I’m sorry I screwed everything up.”If she hadn’t screwed up, I might never have known Sam. I might never have learned what love feels. . any..." The sniffles became louder, and she admitted "Curt, I'm scared!" How scared?" he asked gently."You know they've decided to run every senior through," she reminded him. "It's going to happen to me, and I just know I can't do it." Jordan, can I pick you up and we'll go somewhere and talk?" Uh, yeah. I'd like that. But I can't until about one o'clock, OK?" No problem. See you then."Curt did not know if that call had made him feel any better or not. At least Jordan was still his friend, and that knowledge had always given him a warm feeling.There was one other idea that had been on Curt's mind in his few spare moments. Molly had mentioned that her brother, Bert, was intent on helping kids survive the Program. Curt had been consumed helping them escape, but only a few actually could escape. Maybe he should call Bert.Darryl answered the phone, and hearing who it was, he told Bert. A bit reluctant to leave the company of the three girls, Bert was nevertheless happy to hear from.
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